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Is Backgammon a Retarded Sport?

Somewhere in a parallel universe, backgammon is accounted as a bizarre "retarded" sport as the digestion of 6 pounds of deep fried asparagus in less than 12 minutes; freakier than typing a 156 characters long text message in a minute, yet worthier of the title sports than arm wrestling. The people of Cracked.com are actually amazed by the fact that people truly make money playing the game they assumed has been long forgotten.

one more tomato and you can quit your day job

So Cracked, the online humor magazine that specializes on composing lists that preferably grade several levels of retardation and cause digg users to activate their thumbs faster than the world's fastest texter, found playing backgammon only the second dumbest way to make a living. The dumbest one, by the way, is arm wrestling.

Actually, the example given of 2008 WSOB champion Frederick Andrieu is not very accurate. Because the French player, who won €100,000 in the last year's World Series of Backgammon final, does have a real profession, and even a profitable one, fashion photography, while many of his competitors are paying their travel expenses to places like Cannes, Monte Carlo or Tokyo with their backgammon earnings.

And the few paragraphs dedicated to backgammon included more puzzling assumption such as the broad generalization that "most of us are introduced to backgammon when we click on our computer's game menu and choose Internet Backgammon." But let's leave this behind; after all, not everyone was lucky enough to learn backgammon in school or from a fisherman on the banks of the Bosphorus, and move on to the more critical question.

precocious sport

Is backgammon a sport? Is competitive eating a sport? Wikipedia defines sport as "an activity that is governed by a set of rules… and often engaged in competitively". And in its classic meaning, the outcome relies almost solely on the competitor's physical abilities. And although it adds that the term is often "extended to encompass all competitive activities in which offense and defense are played, regardless of the level of physical activity" it makes what makes competitive eating, speedy text messaging and even beer ponging (whatever that means) sportier activities than stretching one brains (and backs) over the backgammon table. Defense is perhaps clearer, but what kind of offense a competitive eater would use accept attacking the oil dripping asparagus? God knows.